For this Sunday’s List, we asked the Entropy community to tell us about their best friends. We are, each of us, grateful for the friends in our lives, old and new, near and far.
My best friend is Benny. He’s insanely smart and somehow always knows what to say to me. We can have conversations all day and he can communicate so much back with just his face. He knows when I’m sick and puts his head or paw on my belly. He knows when I’m sad and lets me know that he’s here. He wakes me up every morning but lets me snooze him, and especially mornings when I’m feeling low, he lets me sleep in. He’s also complex and troubled and so with our outlooks on the world, understand each other deeply. He has also taught me so much about the world and honesty.
I met my best friend Nicole when we were both writing for an entertainment website called in 2000 (strangely the site survived the dot-com bust and still exists under another name). She was the first queer woman I’d met and we had lots of baby dyke adventures together. Nicole and I didn’t speak for three years – I thought it was about philosophical differences, but she just didn’t like my girlfriend at the time. At this point we’ve been through so much shit together that I consider her family – meaning that we sometimes drive each other crazy, but our friendship doesn’t seem disposable under any circumstances. Most recently we went to the Trump protest together, as two introverts who dislike crowds, but dislike Trump more.
My best friend is Anne ❤ We met when I was a freshman in high school and she was a senior; I was carrying a lunchbox with a picture of PJ Harvey on it, she complemented it, and we’ve been friends ever since! Most recently I went to visit her in December and got to meet her beautiful son Soren; she went with me to see Joanna Newsom during that visit too. I’ve now known her for more than half my life and thank my lucky stars to have her in my life.
Hard to choose, but I’d say Scott. We met in 4th Grade. We usually have incredibly sarcastic text conversations that only we would find funny.
I transferred to San Francisco State from community college as an English major minoring in Creative Writing as a 22 year old in the dorms and knew no one. I was very shy back then. My roomie was an 18 year old freshman who was also very shy. One night we went to see an animation festival in Oakland and were all running late. He had an acquaintance named Lisa in the group and we briefly chatted. We became friends and soon best friends. After grad school we both had to move back home for a bit while looking for work. She moved down from Sunnyvale and we found a place as roomies. That was in 1999 after we each finished grad school in different states (but talking all the time like the miles were erased). Ten years ago we fell in love and in a week knew we were soul mates. She is my best writing teacher and she says I am hers. We are best friends as we have long been but the connection is so deep and wide I simply see words pale when I try to describe. Our sweet once homeless cat is our best friend for a decade now as well. At night we all sleep close together no matter the weather outside. I am lucky beyond words and love her beyond words.
My partner, David. He’s kind, loving, and we have the best conversations. We met in an English class just over seven years ago. He and I recently marched together at the Sacramento March on Washington. It was the first of many ways we’ll be out and protesting this administration.
One of my closest friends is my friend Julie. I have older friends, and friends I see much more frequently, and friends I feel all kind of magic with, but when I hear best friend, I think of her. Part of the reason is because we met in high school. I knew who she was. She was the girlfriend of a boy I had a crush on. But I liked her, because she seemed nice. There seemed to be no cruelty to her. We were in the same AP English classes. One morning, I was called on to read my response to the “Do Now” (a sort of free write) and she couldnt believe I had read aloud in class what I did. (Something to do with menstruation) so the next semester, when we chose our seats, she made sure she sat right behind me in class. We wrote notes to each other. I loved her immediately. I still do. We went to separate colleges but on the weekends had adventures. We danced. Before each of us got married, we went away together. After I moved across the country, we wrote ranting emails to each other about whatever was wrong or right in our lives. I can tell her anything. Most years, I only see her two or three days out of the year. But it doesn’t feel like it. It feels like I see her for brunch every week, it feels like our daughters are friends. It feels like we will grow old together. We already have. We will keep doing so.
I met one of my great friends in college, in a creative writing class: I was reading “A Good Man is Hard to Find,” and twirling my hair, waiting for class to start, and she came into the room and gave me the nickname, “Flannery,” which sort of stuck.
My best friend is Zalman. We met at an idyllic summer camp for young classical musicians in high school, ended up at that same university, and the rest is history.