Thin Lizzy – Bad Reputation (1977)
A card game that breaks out in the middle of a bar fight that had broken out in the middle of a card game.
* * *
Duran Duran – Duran Duran (1981)
Sexy aliens writing their plan for global domination in lipstick.
* * *
Duran Duran – Rio (1982)
Someone in the shadows at the end of the bar sends you a drink on a coaster made from the page in the bible that has the line “Your navel is a rounded bowl; / it never lacks mixed wine.”
* * *
New Order – Power, Corruption & Lies (1983)
The movie Groundhog Day, except Bill Murray is a manic-depressive botanist and Andie McDowell is a goth with a heart of gold.
* * *
Employed to Serve – The Warmth of a Dying Sun (2017)
A bumper sticker on a broken rickshaw that says “Don’t talk to me until I’ve had my morning IV full of diesel fuel and blood from a member of the ruling class.”
* * *
Mayors of Miyazaki – Holy Cop (2013)
A Rube Goldberg enthusiast spends all winter licking doorknobs until the last person who walks through the door falls in love with them.
* * *
Duster – Stratosphere (1998)
The blackbox recording of the passengers on a plane that crashed into Lake Michigan, glided along the top of the water for a few miles, and then soared back into the air.
* * *
Duran Duran – Seven and the Ragged Tiger (1983)
Sleeping on a pile of money and having half a dream about what it might be like to play in a wedding band.
* * *
Great Falls – A Sense of Rest (2018)
The score to a documentary about 1980’s post office massacres played at half speed.
* * *
Kublai Khan – Nomad (2017)
Screaming your favorite protein shake recipe into the open mouth of some dude yelling out directions for the best way to repurpose the extra fabric from turning your camo pants into camo shorts.
* * *
Gehennah – Decibel Rebel (1998)
You put “i’m fuckin wasted so sure why not” where it says “Sex” on the application for a job at what you think is the hardware store but is actually a really poorly-maintained Bed Bath & Beyond.
* * *
Jim O’Rourke – The Visitor (2009)
Spending your entire life driving the circumference of the earth at the bottom of the ocean and never needing to know that there’s something happening above you.
* * *
Mick Turner – Don’t Tell the Driver (2013)
The sound of an opera singer pulling an about-face somewhere in the distance is making the washing machine have second thoughts about the drumset tumbling around inside of it.
